This last Monday, I started watching movies about my family from when I was 8 months old to when I was 8 years old. Watching those videos, I noticed a couple things...
1. I was a DAMN cute kid.
2. Things have changed so much...
Its weird to have forgotten what you used to be like. I always only saw myself as a shy quiet kid. Turns out, I was much smarter, open, and jovial kid, than I ever would have guessed.
Also, I was BLOND and I was skinny!
I'm watching, right now, a play I did when I was in the first grade. In it is the FIRST girl I ever had a crush on. Kristyn Donnelly... I would follow her around like a puppy.
Its also sad seeing pets and family that have passed away over the years. So many loved ones I took for granted. Now, I'd give anything for a minute with any of those pets, or family members.
For the last few years, since I went to CSU and decided I wasn't smart enough to be a biologist, I had a difficult time discovering who I was. Watching these videos is almost like a time machine. It doesn't take away any of the mistakes, but it shows me what I use to dream and the spirit I lost somewhere along the way.
I don't really know why I'm posting this, other than because I had to write these thoughts and feelings somewhere.
The emotions with this... it's part nostalgia, part sentimental, part archaeological dig, and lots of understanding.
I'm now watching my cousin, a new born (now 16). Anyone that has family videos of themselves, I suggest they go watch. Amazing...
